Acceptance

Acceptance. We have to have it as a parent. Sometimes things happen, beyond our control, and...well....
Yesterday we went to WalMart. All 3 of us (the girls that is). Now, shopping with 3 females would never be considered wise. Far too many emotions in too close a space, ya know?
So there we are...barely to the toiletry section, already I'm wanting to escape. Not really, they really are fun to be with, even at WalMart. But you have to have a game plan and the game plan rarely, if ever, includes disaster. Get in. Get what you need. Keep Sophie from jumping out of the buggie. Keep Sarah busy so her "question time" is limited. Pay. Get out. Pray it all gets done before Sophie realizes she's surrounded by FOOD!!!
Where was I? Oh yeah.
Within 4 minutes I look down to discover....*gasp*....one of Sophie's treasured shoes is GONE!!! How? It was just there???!!!! In milliseconds I knew it could be anywhere from the van to our current isle. This seems like nothing to you doesn't it? Turn around and go get it. Big deal. You don't understand. I don't even understand. All I knew is that bringing attention to that shoe-less foot was going to be a major, MAJOR, kink in our chain.
A disastrous injury in our line-up.
I looked back. Nothing.
Oh Lord. Not that pink shoe...oooooohhhh no. The reality was setting in. *I* had a major attachment to that shoe. This is Sophie's most favorite pair of "jooes". They are a part of her and everything I remember about her last 6 months! This crazy, ugly pair of $6 "jooes" were never, evah!, going to leave my possession.
I felt it all welling up inside me. I couldn't go back from fear that I would have a total melt down there in WalMart with my 2 precious, in the flesh, children...over a pair of shoes!!!
I blocked it out.
Kept with the plan.
As I approached the dairy section, some well-intentioned, but obviously clueless mom said, "you lost a shoe. wasn't sure if you noticed."
I managed a cordial enough response.
I retraced our steps on our way to the check-out. I searched the van. And tonight I've finally accepted it.
The other shoe is gone.
The pair is no more.
And now, one lonely pink shoe sits on top of the bookshelf. And Sophie noticed it. "joo" she said. "Yes baby, joo."
Thank God for "puppy" and "aggghhhh" (that's all she'll say for her blankie). Sarah didn't have too many attachments. Just blankie and me. :) But Sophie has them in spades.
I'm glad.
Lots of sweet memories.
So next time you see an ugly pink croc-like shoe, remember Sophie...remember "joo".

My Ma Ingalls moment thanks to the economy

Most of you know of my adoration for Little House on the Prairie. I've always wanted to be as kind, patient, self-giving, hard-working as Ma was. Well, today I got to have a Ma Ingalls moment...of sorts.
I have to admit, the economy is not being kind to us. (Every one does have shoes now, by the way.) We're far from starving or even nutritionally lacking, but we don't have desserts just because we "want" them anymore. Well, some things...like Diet Dr Pepper in the morning for Ma are just plain necessary for the well-being of the family. :) So I ask Glen to take the girls and some of my "entertainment" money to Kroger. Sarah asked if she could buy something with her "monies" (a.k.a. money from birthdays gone by) and comes out with a fully prepared purse. (I've never seen her get up before but she's obviously been working hard on it.) She asked what she could buy and I said whatever she wanted and she said "ice cream for our dessert?" I just smiled and said "that would be wonderful" sure she'd bring in some piece of plastic junk or nothing at all because she's forgotten she even had the money.
But in she came...so proud of her purchase. And when I saw it I couldn't believe she really bought her family dessert!



And maybe I'm over-emotionalizing it, but I'm sure this is how Ma felt when she realized Laura bought that stove for her!

And although I'm not a fan of this flavor, I'm thinking it will taste really good tonight.

I've started updating our school blog if you are interested in seeing what's going on there. (or if you are just a picture junkie :) ) I'm not sure how I'll do the two blogs...they might eventually be going back to just this one. We'll just have to see how things happen. I've put a link to it over in the "links" section of this blog too so you can find it later. And it's prettier than this blog...although a work in progress.

How in the world do you dress them????

It's that time of year again where you never know how to dress. Forget an all day outing because you'd have to bring tear away clothes...that can be put back on. If you live where I live, you know what I mean.
Wake up in the morning and "buuuurrrrrrrr"...ok, it's not snowing, but you certainly can't pull out that trusty ole sundress and be done. No, now it's time to start looking for pants. But what kind? Jeans would be good at 8am, but good heavens by 10 you'd be cooking in them! Wear thinner pants and then you're thinking "what can I put on up top to keep them warm until the sun warms things up?" Which, if you are a mom, you are also calculating in your mind how many extra pieces of clothing you'll be keeping up with by the end of said event. Plus your camera. Plus your purse. Plus the lunches. And don't forget your hurricane.
So if nothing else we get a good month of Project Runway - Southern Style. And you just have to "make it work". Making it work will inevitably lead to some of the craziest ensambles this side of Bryant Park.

Here is Sarah at 4pm today. Pants necessary at 9am and 4pm...were pretty steamy at noon. Shirt...dug out of pile of "too small, wrong season" items. This pile lingers until, oh, late December because "hot flashes" still pop up every once and a while. Shoes....let's look closer at the shoes....



A friend gave her these this summer. Sad to say, they are the lone surviving pair of shoes we have right now. Nothing else fits her. This hasn't been a problem yet. But I think that's about to change. We have to go to the pumpkin patch with our co-op on Tuesday and I'm afraid that even I can't let her show up to the hay ride with flip flops on. I just found out this morning that the sneakers I planned on her wearing did not grow with her feet this year. *sigh* I feel like Ma Ingalls when Laura needed new shoes...anyone remember that episode? The episode ended with everyone getting new shoes...looks like Ma has to go shopping.




Sophie's outfit isn't quite as daring. But I had to show what a cute little farm girl we have. :)

The entire outfit is, ummmm, recycled. Sarah wore the onsie a lot but was always to skinny for the overalls. Not a problem with Miss Hurricane. Actually, I think the overalls came from our "Lauren and Makenna" stash. Hand-me-downs from a friend who's little girl is in middle school now. Some things really last!



Ah yes...the crocs. Not real ones, wouldn't want to slight the designer. But the important thing to know is that these are the only things Sophie believes to be "shoes". haha She's cool with socks. But switches to tornado mode if you try to combine socks and shoes!! Put something on that laces...oh my! It's like she's sure she just landed on Mars. There was a red pair before this pink pair. To this day I have to hide them high up, and in back of the shelf they are on because she will scale the highest heights to reach those "joos". And she has a thing for shoes. Her puppy and her shoes. 2nd and 3rd only to mommy. :) So Ma has no idea what she will buy for the little one tomorrow.



And a small update on "what's new?". Sophie broke in 2 new molars and a new bottom front tooth this week! I started to be relieved but then realized which teeth would be next...those mean ole pointy ones. And she's closing the gap on her sister...they are now only 2 sizes apart!

And regarding Operation: Bring Abby Home. I haven't heard anything. But Sarah has suddenly been praying a lot for Abby to come home...maybe she knows something we don't.

"Safe and Non-toxic" has a whole new meaning.....

I remember, long ago, when Sarah was a 17 month old thinking "what's the big deal about washable crayons?" "Safe and Non-toxic" was like a given to me. Sort of like the warning on hair dryers not to use them in the bath tub..."thanks for warning me but I wasn't planning on it, and was there ever anyone who really did that?"

Sarah had real crayons (apparently not washable, though I never had to find out) and even markers at about 18 months. She just was never interested in doing anything but coloring with them...on paper I might add. And as far as "non-toxic" went, she didn't eat it if it wasn't food. Even play food took FOREVER for her to pretend to eat! And yes, I appreciated that I didn't have an oral baby. I knew she tipped the scale in the "easy" direction.

Enter Sophie. All I can say is, it's 5:30pm and we've somehow managed not to visit the ER. "Sophie" suddenly seems like such a serene name and totally wrong for....I don't know....Katrina. Hurricane Katrina Swan. Yes, that's how I feel. Like I spend every single day with Hurricane Katrina...with the same sense of gratitude for survival at the end of each day, that I felt back with the real storm. :)

Just like a hurricane, she starts so breezy and beautiful. Her wake-ups in the morning are like the calm before the storm. She wakes at a decent time and coos and giggles and waits patiently up to an hour for someone to come in.
But that's it...after that...consider the evacuation notice posted. Get out while you can or hold on to your hat! And just like a storm, it all seems so natural...such a natural disaster. I really think she's just whirling through her day without a single plan...her surge will be the test of your foundation!

Today, we are starting our handwriting time like every other day. And Sophie seems interested so I give her a piece of paper and a washable (I've already figured that one out with her!) non-toxic (that lesson is coming) crayon. I'm thinking I'm safe because she just had eggs, a muffin, and a whole banana (I know better than to tempt her on an empty stomach).
So I go on about my business with the laundry. Sarah chimes in with "Sophie has it in her mouth, mom." Of course my first thought is "well, of course she does." But by the time I get the 10 steps over to her, this is what I find.....



perhaps a close-up is in order because that cheerful, beautiful, not-an-ounce-of-guilt face...can be misleading.




Can you guess what colors she had? Yeah, blue and yellow. She felt the need to try them BOTH! And for whatever reason she doesn't just mouth the stuff...she actually naws on it! We feed her, I promise! I mean, look at her!
Then I found myself looking for the "non-toxic" label. Thank goodness!!!
This is not a random incident either. The girl will try anything. Chalk, dirt, a beetle (I was able to knock that out of her hand before it touched her mouth, but she would have tried it! She could probably eat the guy from Man vs Wild under the table!), leaves, fuzz, soap (a current favorite. Making something as simple as hand-washing exhausting.), need I go on??

Lunch time is the eye of the storm. She goes from playful to "why the hell aren't you feeding me???!!!" in about 2 minutes...so don't dilly-dally. Fill her up and she'll go right into her bedroom on her own. Naptime. For everyone. Can't reach me in the afternoon? Now you know why. Do I seem scattered and almost irresponsible? It's because my head is still spinning and the recovery process doesn't last long enough. I'll get better. Oh, do I pray I'll get better!
The hour and a half between waking up and dinner are all about keeping her busy enough not to realize she's not eating. Good luck with that since grass reminds her of food. You see my problem???? *sigh*

So, as I wait patiently for our trip to the ER for our first stomach pumping...I hope her adoring public can enjoy her antics.

--edited to add: I hate my computer! It should not be this hard to upload a picture! You'd think I'm asking this thing to show me a movie in high def or something!!!! grrrrrrr. Pictures will have to wait until Diva PC is in a better mood. I'm currently accepting any and all donations to the "Save Kim's Sanity - Get Her a Mac!" fund. :) :) :)

Wordless Wednesday

O.K. Life is getting back to "normal"

At least my normal.

The girls and I loaded up the van and headed to sunny Florida last Friday. Most of you know I'm not much of a "road trip" girl. Long stretches in an automobile is a lot like water torture to me. But alas, this easy trip was staring me in the face. I figured if Sophie could endure 6 hours strapped in her car seat, I could endure 6 hours driving. Sarah? oh, she's no big deal in a car seat. Sophie, well, it's sort of like watching a butterfly in a tornado when she's on a road trip.

Anywho...
We headed out about 8am. Sarah has to wear "NASA pants" on any trip. In the toddler world they are known as pull-ups, but I needed to call them something more grown up for my growing, potty-trained girl. So I told her "I've heard of an astronaut that wore pants like this when she drove from TX to FL to, um, visit a friend. So if they are smart for astronauts...." Hence, "NASA pants".
Can you tell I get a bit focused when I'm going from point A to point B?
As we approached the FL state line I had fond memories of getting orange juice at the welcome center, so I actually made a stop. Sure enough! Fresh orange juice for all. Yummy.
Then, it occurred to me that another friend lived a couple hours from where I was headed, so why not call her and invite her too???? And do you know? Laura, Hannah Grace and Joel all got to come to sunny FL and visit too! Now that's what I call multi-tasking at it's best!

Saturday we headed for the Emerald coast. Ah, the beautiful beaches, the clear, perfect water....and Sophie. God bless her. Oh no, she wasn't scared. Are you kidding? That would have made it easy. No, just ran right out into the water. Kept walking. Fell. Got up. Kept walking.
"Who's yelling 'stop' at me?" she thinks....
uhh, Mommy.
"la da di di di da" thinks Sophie.
A mouth full of salt water. "Where's Mommy?" thinks Sophie. "oh good. there she is running towards me." sighs Sophie. "Press on" thinks Sophie.
(Mommy checks for Sarah, who is gleefully playing with Sandra and her kids. No worries, that kid sticks to the mommy-types like glue....)
"Crap, where's Sophie?" thinks Mommy
Ok, there she is popping back up out of the water.
Sophie keeps walking.
I keep thinking at some point the child will figure out that the water is getting deeper and the waves getting stronger. No, not Sophie. I finally grab her and bring her back to shore so I can rest.
Well, as Sandra can now attest to, Sophie is either full motion, asleep, or ready to eat.
We decide to have a snack. Because at least food will keep Sophie out of the water. When the cheese and crackers aren't coming her way fast enough she decides just to eat the sand. Yeah, gross. Of course I tried to stop her. I cleaned her tongue off 3 times. Finally, I gave in and just let her eat it. I had to rest before she took on the tide again.
After being out there for what felt like 6 hours...but I think it was more like 2 hours, we called it a day. Sarah, Piper, and Allie had a blast. I'm sure Sophie did too, but I'd rather run a marathon than watch Sophie at the beach again for at least a year.

Thank goodness Sandra is carefree. She totally understood that I needed...even WANTED...to be close to the house for the rest of the weekend. Sophie and I need Sophie to have her naptime.

But the big girls didn't mind. They just enjoyed doing nothing and everything together! And getting to meet Sandra was great!

Oh, I probably didn't mention that I had never *really* met Sandra before this weekend. She and I met online with one of our adoption groups while we were waiting to adopt Sarah and Allie. About 9 of us have been in close touch since the group started back in March '04. I've now met 3 of them in real life. And so the miracle of the red thread continues. God has blessed us with even more great friends!

Clocking Back In and My Strange Little Bird.....

Everyone join me in a big round of applause for DH (dear husband)!!!! He took off of his regular job last Thursday and Friday to allow me to "clock out" for a glorious 4 day weekend with a friend.
We left at 530 am on Thursday and got home at 530pm on Sunday. Here's the part you will either totally appreciate, or totally not get....Thursday we scrapped (scrapbooked) for 12 hours. Friday for 14 hours. Saturday for 14 hours. And Sunday for about 3 hours. The only other things we did were eat and sleep. And both of those were fantastic too!!!!
While eating, I never once looked next to me to make sure no one was making mashed potatoes out of their french fries. My friend was kind enough to sit still and not ask me to cut anything for her. heehee
Sleeping. Oh my. Even though Glen does the majority of bedtime anyway, it was beyond weird to just put on my jammies and go to bed.
I missed my little Indians and the chief, but it was soooo nice to just be the Lone Ranger for a bit.

About my strange little bird. Yes, every child is different. Sophie seems a tad addicted to her schedule though. In the beginning, she would usually be in the Pack-n-Play around 430 while I breathed. :) Well, the last week or two, maybe three....if I leave her in the living room with big sis to watch tv she's been climbing onto the couch and sliding into "her corner of the world", as I call it. Yes, the Pack-n-Play. Seriously...she climbs in by herself. IN. She's there now, just as happy as can be.
She is quite happy in that part of the world too. She's there while Sarah and I do school...and never makes a peep.
But not to mislead the reading public.....she is woman and you can most certainly hear her roar!! She's not particularly fond of having things taken away from her. At all. Even if her Go Gurt sleeve is empty and you take it without preparing her for the seperation....run. Run I say. The girl will break your heart and ear drum in 2 seconds flat!!! Take the Wal-Mart sticker off her shirt without warning....oh my. And my favorite, if you've been out of the room and come in and pick her up...do not put her down and walk away!!! There is an unwritten law in her world that everyone say hello properly and for the right amount of time. Especially Mom and Dad.

I think she's gotten some molars in. I'd try to look but the last time I did that I lost a fingernail. I'm not talking about a small chip. She bit so hard that I still have a blood blister under the tiny part of the nail that didn't come off. Think "nail bed"...think "raw"...think..."jaws of life". I'm leaving the "looking at teeth" to the ped and his wood stick. To think there is a dentist that is going to have to brave the task of counting those suckers.

She has almost made her tricycle go all by herself!!! She's trying. But until she figures out what we mean when we say "PUSH!" we'll just keep laughing when she picks up her feet and pushes the handlebars with all her might!

Sarah is doing great in school. Reading is coming so easily to her that it's a bit intimidating for me. :) In math she is learning to count money...but she doesn't seem to make the connection that it's money that buys the stuff at the store. Perhaps when we get to the chapter on the differences between Master Card, Visa, and Discover and what the logos look like....her interest will be peaked. *wink* Kids today....it's sooooo different. haha.
Handwriting is probably her least favorite subject. But in a few days we'll start with something a little more interesting. You practice writing a bible verse the entire week and at the end of the week you write it on special paper and send it to someone. So if you seem to be getting Sarah's homework in the mail....it's a special verse from her to you. :)
For our bible time we are reading ABC Bible Verses. She is memorizing a verse of the Bible for every letter of the alphabet. She's a little sponge! I think it helps that she gets a gum ball for everyone that she memorizes...and then can cash in the gum balls for "screen time".

Ballet is going so well. She adores her teacher. I adore the school. And, if I do say so myself, Sarah has beautiful form! :)
Tae Kwon Do...hmmmmm....she loves it. They love her. But the girl has ants in her pants when she's there. This week they commented on what good focus she has. Huh? Who?
Our homeschool co-op has been such a blessing! I've met some wonderful moms and Sarah loves her friends. God has answered prayers and blessed our step of faith. We are truly where He has called us to be this season.

So there you have it.... so much for "Wordless Wednesday" huh?